Testicular Tornado!

Balls. That’s what this blog post is about. If you are sensitive to talking about the human body or sexuality: A) Grow up and B) Close this window.

Are you sure? You’ve been warned.

Last July I wrote a blog post about how I had discovered some swelling in my testicles. To sum it up, I was masturbating one night and I noticed that my testicles did not look like other guys’ testicles. My scrotum looked more round and you couldn’t make out the testicles. I panicked (naturally) and made an appointment with my primary care physician.

I met with my physician and some med student who examined my testicles. Luckily for that med student, I am an instructor so by profession so I made him get involved in his learning. My doctor verified that I did indeed have swelling around both my testicles. She had a couple of theories regarding the swelling, but wanted me to get an ultrasound to be sure.

Fun fact about getting an ultrasound on your scrotum: Straight, gay, bi, or anywhere in between, you will get an awkward erection when the ultrasound is being rolled around your sack. It feels incredibly good and they know that. It made sense why the ultrasound tech had me put a towel over my penis in the beginning!

The results from the ultrasound showed that I not only have hydrocele (fluid build up in my testicles) but I also have something called varicocele.

From Urologyhealth.org: A varicocele is when veins become enlarged inside your scrotum (the pouch of skin that holds your testicles). These veins are called the pampiniform plexus. Ten to 15 of every 100 men have a varicocele. It is like getting a varicose vein in your leg.

This is exactly what I am experiencing:


I spoke to my doctor about some options for the hydrocele. She referred me to a urologist to dig deeper into this and see what options were available to me to get this worked out. She said I could get the hydrocele drained, or that I could have a surgery done to fix it. The only thing that had helped with the swelling at the time was ejaculation. Yes, masturbation was the short-term remedy and my doctor said that if ejaculation is helping, then maybe my semen wasn’t flowing correctly.

Guys, think about how your balls feel when you haven’t got off in a few days. Now imagine that with a shit ton of mixed up veins that get really backed the fuck up. That’s my world.

Fast forward to today:

I met with the urologist today, on 2/10/2016. Once he examined my testicles, he said that my hydrocele was so small that I did not have to worry about those at all. He said that I definitely have moderate varicocele. The medical community is not sure exactly what causes varicocele so he opted against any kind of procedure. Instead, he had me give a urine sample so they could see what else could be causing this.

Here’s where I am concerned. He asked me if I ever wanted to have children. Varicocele can cause infertility in men. Considering I’v had this for quite sometime, there could be a chance that I will become infertile or that I am already shooting blanks. When he dropped that “infertility” bomb, that was a reality check. I reached out to my physician and asked if I should have a sperm count done.

I have passively thought about having children before. Now I have to come to grips that I may never have biological children. I can always still be a dad though. Blood doesn’t make family.

In the meantime, I just have to deal with it until another option can be found.

Do any of you someone or have any of you ever dealt with varicocele? If so, what insight can you offer? Suggestions or tips?


Masturbation and Men’s Health

Some people judge masturbation and talk about how bad it is. Right now, I am even more grateful to it than I was before! It totally just saved my ass..well..my balls really.

A couple of weeks ago, I was feeling a little horny so I decided to watch some porn and masturbate. While I was watching, I noticed the balls of one of the guys. They didn’t look like mine. His scrotum wasn’t as round as mine. It was just flesh and two balls.

That made me nervous. I felt around my testicles and it felt and looked differently than that guys. I could feel a lot more “stuff” around my testicles. I also noticed that when I felt around, I could feel a mass or something. I think it was the tubes that went to my testicles. I could make them out through my scrotum flesh. I finished jerking off and came. I noticed that after ejaculation that the swelling went down some, but then it would come back again later.

I immediately made a doctor’s appointment to have that checked out. When I went to the doctor, she (and her medical student shadowing her) both looked at my testicles. She agreed that there was definitely some swelling. She wanted to make sure there wasn’t a mass she couldn’t see so she referred me to get an ultrasound. That ultrasound is today. I am really nervous about it! My doctor thinks it is probably Epididymitis. I think it is too. It would certainly explain a lot. I am scared that it could be something worse though. I’m trying to stay calm and not think the worst. I just want to express that this is a bit scary.

Either way, this was a good reminder to always check my body for any issues. I am really grateful that video gave me some visibility to an issue that I didn’t even know I had.

**Update 10/11/2015**

I received my ultrasound results and it turns out that I have something called hydrocele in my testicles. There is fluid build up around each testicle. It has gone away since that ultrasound so my sac is going back to normal size. It’s better to be safe than sorry though!

Happy Maysturbation Month! (18+)

Before I get started, I just want to give anyone uncomfortable with masturbation a few moments to exit this blog post. This blog is very deep, sexual, and personal. Again, turn away if you cannot handle this. You have been warned.

Happy National Masturbation Month!! How exciting! Oh you didn’t know? May is National Masturbation Month. Here is a brief history on this special month.

You are probably wondering “Why is guy Valdet writing about masturbation? Everyone does it. What makes him special? Is this for real?” I am writing about it because everyone is so fucking weird about it! No one ever talks about it! This month is meant to bring to light the natural act of masturbating. When did fulfilling a human basic need become such a disgusting taboo in society? Well, we all know religion is the main culprit here. This blog is not about that though, since I am all about the celebration of this awesome month! I have always been a strong advocate for masturbating and sex not being so taboo. So here we go!

I masturbate. Almost daily. Sometimes twice a day. Sometimes I just stroke it when I am watching a movie or Googling something. Why the fuck the wouldn’t I? It’s my damn cock! The warmth of my hand cupped around my hard cock as I jerk it is an amazing feeling.  While I do not believe in God or intelligent design, cocks are definitely an intelligent creation. My cock is readily accessible fun. It is right there whenever I want.

Before we get into the pleasures of my penis, let’s go back. Let’s delve into my discovery of masturbation. It is so taboo to talk about that I haven’t really shared this story with many people. I was probably about 13 or 14 when I first discovered masturbating. It was not a special story. I was at that age where my body was starting to change from a boy to a man. I was in my bed, I rolled over to get comfortable when my cock pressed against the mattress. If felt really good. I could feel my cock starting swell. Naturally I pulled it out to look at it. It was so awesome to see this adult cock in my hand. I was excited that it was a big cock too lol! I wanted to continue this awesome feeling and rubbing definitely worked. The first time I shot a load was sweet! I was a fucking dude! It was a little messy, but that is to be expected. You can’t just hand someone a unicorn and expect them to know what to do with it! I eventually learned the perks of socks. They made clean up pretty easy. I also discovered how much fun jerking off in the shower was! Rubbing a wet cock was even better than rubbing/jerking a dry one! Needless to say, I would jerk off whenever I could. It definitely happened a few times a day!  I also did it bathroom stalls or the library bathroom. Why not? I had the privacy. Both guests of the party were there. Why not rock and roll? If you can piss and poop in a bathroom, I don’t see why you can’t pump one out. That was my logic in those young teen years anyway. No one ever really told me anything about it growing up. I kind of just figured it out on my own and from what I did hear from other guys.

In my adult years I still appreciate masturbation. Probably even more then back when I was a teenager because I have control. I know my body now. I know what my cock likes and doesn’t like. I know just when I am close to cumming before I slow it down. I really like to savor my masturbation sessions. Sure I incorporate quick “lunch break” jerks because I don’t have the time. Those are enjoyable too. Luckily at this age I can indicate to my body that it needs to hurry up and cum, or slow the fuck down and really embrace this hand hug.

Technique wise, I don’t really do anything too crazy. I’ve tried several things that I have read online before. “The Stranger” just doesn’t seem to work too well for me. I honestly really enjoy just a nice, naked, kicked back, warming lube filled masturbation session. I go at my pace. The warming lube feels amazing when I rub my cock in all the right places. When I get close, I just slow down and rub some lube on my nipple (nipple play is fun). If any of you have an feel good suggestions, please share them!

A really awesome way to masturbate is a fleshlight. I have two. The older I didn’t really care for because of it’s awkward size. I bought the Fleshlight Flight and I could not be happier!

This fleshlight is amazing! If you do not know what this is, and do not have one, you are missing out! It is a great way to spice up your spanking. As guys, we all enjoy our cocks in something tight and warm. Whether it be a mouth, pussy, and ass. Our cocks were meant to be in at least 1 or 2 of those. Maybe 3 if you are super fun. Sometimes we just don’t get that from traditional masturbation. When I am really hard and horny, I bust out my fleshlight, which is named JC after straight porn star Johnny Castle. I slab some warming lube (trust me, it’s worth it) on my cock, and finger JC and fill him up with lube. Then I just sit back and slide my cock into this flesh like material. The special texturized interior feels so amazing. If you angle it just right it can feel like a mouth or other hole riding your cock. I have had some phenomenal self love sessions with this thing. I am a load moaner when I orgasm/cum, and I am sure some of my neighbors can tell when there is a special occasion. Using the tried and true sock method, clean up is a breeze. You can just cum right into the fleshlight and rinse it out. Who doesn’t like easy? And nothing beats cumming into the hole you are in! It also beats lost crispy tissues!

I am also a huge fan of porn for providing “inspiration” to my cock. I have a lot of respect for porn actors (we can discuss the psychological issues another time) , and the men and women who watch porn. Especially women. I love how many fantasies can come to life. If you like something, it’s out there. We all have our vices. Not to stereotype men, but we are known to all jerk off. Women are a little trickier. So when I hear that a woman watches porn, and masturbates, I fucking love it! I wish all women talked about masturbation. I love sexual women. Women who shudder at the idea of sliding their own finger up their own cunt make me sad! What a waste! There is just so much opportunity for a good time there. Same for the few dudes in the world who don’t jerk off. How does that even happen (barring medical situations)? How does one resist the urge to satisfy their aroused sex organs? When I get hard, my first instinct is to just grab it and go to town. There is nothing wrong with that urge! That is why it is called an urge! Fuck religion, fuck God, fuck the Bible. I don’t know why they chose to oppress everyone in regards to sex (among everything else). It is nothing to be ashamed of!

As an adult, I have a much more lax attitude to masturbating. I am definitely more free about it and willing to discuss it more. Why? Well why not? Masturbation is a natural part of our sexuality. I love it! Now I talk with my friends about it as casually as we do our plans for the weekend (which includes jerking off lol). We as humans (and animals too) get sexually aroused. It happens. Sometimes, for us guys, it isn’t even about sexual arousal. It is just a physical thing that we cannot control. Morning wood anyone? Wet dreams?

Here are some interesting tidbits about masturbation (lol at the FAP FAP FAP)

So it quite clear that masturbating is not only natural, but it is very common. You would never know that though because no one ever wants to bring it up. Except now this guy.

There is something else I would like to touch on. Well, besides myself lol. The amount at . which people masturbate. I am speaking from a guy’s point of view mind you. I do not believe at all there is such a thing as too much masturbating. As long as you aren’t rubbing your cock raw that is. If you jerk off 3-4 times a day, who gives a shit. Embrace it. Do it all damn day if you can. I think it just feels too awesome to not.

Here is a little link for everyone: 5 Things You Didn’t Know About Masturbation

Well, I would shake everyone’s hand for taking the time to read my blog, but we all know where our hands have been. =-)

Thank you everyone!

Prostitution may be the oldest profession, but masturbation is the oldest pastime”

A Curious Tale Of The Bi-Curious Gay

This is going to be an extremely personal blog. There is just no way around it. Feel free to close out of this post if my sexuality makes you uncomfortable.

I am writing this blog to share a deep and personal side of me. I was initially embarrassed and nervous to do so, then I realized I don’t really care at all.

I am a 30 year old gay man. I have been gay for as long as I can remember. It’s just something that has always been. I didn’t know what it was called though until second grade. I am sexually attracted to men. I have dated men, hooked up with men, and a combination of the both. I have never been with a woman, except for a few make out sessions.

I want to go on record and say that I have always supported all kinds of consenual relationships between adults. I believe sexuality is fluid and we should never trap ourselves under any label. I think as adults we should be able to freely have sex with anyone who want (who is a consenting adult). Gay, straight, bi, onesomes, twosomes, threesomes, orgies, S&M, are all beautiful to me. With that being said..

About a year ago something strange started happening to me. I began experiencing new changes as I mature into a man in his 30s. It is a new kind of puberty if you will. I was finding myself becoming sexually aroused at the idea of having sex with a woman. First it was just this underlying “ha-ha” joke to myself, but then it began to manifest itself into my dreams. I had a very erotic dream that ended with a woman performing oral sex on me. I woke up all kinds of turned on! It was so bizarre to me! I actually loved it. You could tell I loved it when I woke up lol.

Since then, it has been something growing inside of me. I find myself wanting to make out with women. Or instead of fantasizing about having sex with a man, I sometimes think about a woman instead. Just recently, my female neighbor came over to borrow my wine key and in my head I caught myself thinking “I wonder if she would suck my cock?” That is just one example. I have had many.

I am a man. And like any other man, I watch porn. Porn is awesome and healthy. People who judge porn are uptight and tied down by too many stigmas. It is a great release and use of the imagination. I don’t just watch gay porn though. I also watch porn involving women. I love watching a woman go down on a guy because I pretend I am that guy. I like watching a guy fuck a woman because I pretend that it is me. Honestly, I really want to know what it is like to “stick it in.”

Does that mean that I check out women’s breasts or asses and think how bad I want that. Not really. Do I have romantic feelings for a woman? No. But like everything else, things are subject to change. I think I am more stimulated by the idea of being the only cock in the bed though. There is something very sensual and stimulating about a male/female sexual dynamic. I think the idea of a new type of sex and sexuality is the core of my newfound bicurious nature.

As I stated earlier, I am all for sexuality. It is natural and beautiful. Now I have to learn to apply that same liberal attitude to myself. I only wish that women were as casual about sex as men were. It would make this much easier to explore.

This doesn’t change how I currently see myself. I don’t want people reading this and saying shit like “Welcome back to our team.” I am who I am. I am a 30 year old man who has no shame in exploring his maturing sexuality.

Anyone else want to share?